The Thoughts of Wally Masterson

Consider the following list:

• God
  
• Allah
  
• Zeus
  
• Thor
  
• The Raelian elohim
  
• Peter Pan
  
• Superman
  
• Wally Masterson
  
• Clissy Funkhouser
  

Which is the odd one out? Ponder a while, then read on...
The odd one out is Clissy Funkhouser¹. All others are fictitious characters.
Now consider this. Would you enter into a lifetime's devotion with any of these characters? (Devotion to Wally Masterson is acceptable - it is up to you whether you harbour any devotion towards Clissy Funkhouser, CPA. She looks like a bit of a hotty) The notion is clearly ridiculous. Yet this is how millions of "sentient" beings choose to live their lives. God help us².

Consider the strange case of Clissy Funkhouser. She claims in her biography that "The bedrock of my life is God". Now substitute other names from my list into her claim, and see if any make sense:

• The bedrock of my life is Peter Pan.
  
• The bedrock of my life is Superman.
  
• The bedrock of my life is Wally Masterson.
  
• The bedrock of my life is Clissy Funkhouser.
  

Clearly, the only possible bedrock is Clissy Funkhouser herself. Would you claim anything less ethereal to be your bedrock?

Yours in grumpiness, Wally.


¹The veracity of Clissy Funkhouser's existence can be ascertained here.
²No, the irony is not lost on me.

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